Too afraid to even know what you want?
How do you figure it out when you’re terrified and drawing a blank?
Afraid to make a mistake. Afraid to get it wrong. Afraid to fail. Afraid to succeed.
This is where I have been and sometimes still am, especially after quitting my job.
While spending some time reflecting on this, several questions came to mind:
Is it even necessary to know for sure?
What if it’s OK not to know?
What if not knowing is a normal, healthy and temporary stop along the journey; one we visit time and time again throughout our lives?
What if not knowing does not equal never knowing and just represents where you are right now?
What if choosing doesn’t mean you must choose a perfect option and instead just means choosing something to learn?
What if learning becomes the focus instead of making the right choice?
What would happen if we lean into the not knowing and pair it with a willingness to try new things like you’d try on some new clothes?
You wouldn’t go to a store and try on a new pair of jeans, find that they don’t fit and then instead of taking them off and trying a different size say, “Well, I guess I have to stick with this pair because I tried it on first.”
What if it’s OK that you don’t know?
What if that says nothing about your worth, your intelligence, your success level or your ability to figure it out?
What if you don’t have to figure it out alone?
What if what you want can change again and again and again as you live, get older and gain new information?
What if the people you think know exactly what they want really don’t or have secret, late night doubts, or are living out their parents’ wants or are just staying stuck in what they used to want?
What would it be like to let go of knowing and just try what feels best at the moment?
What would it be like to gain your worth from a place deep within that has nothing to do with what you know, what you do or even who you specifically are?
How would you live if you gave yourself permission to not know?
What would be your next step?
Most questions can be boiled down to:
1.)” I’m scared.”
2.) “I don’t know what to do.”
The Answers:
1.) “One day you’ll be dead.”
2.) “Keep working.”
– Austin Kleon
A snapshot of the above is saved as the background image on my ipad. I stumbled across it a couple of weeks ago, and find it so helpful. For all of your questions, mine, and the countless others whispered in the grips of indecision, Austin has, it seems, pithily summed up the solution. I know, it’s never that easy. But maybe it is.
Thanks for sharing that awesome, Austin Kleon quote, Justin! It is VERY helpful!